Many feelings go through me as I watch the boys wore their new uniforms proudly. Of course, the moment is sometimes lost in their complaining about the scratchy shirts. Amidst their complaining however, the pride and smiles never left their faces. Or mine for that matter. My boys are growing up.

I am lucky to be able to work from home these few days and witness this metamorphosis first hand. Long term however, my mother will come daily to help me with No. 3 as he attends school in the afternoon session. After lunch, she will fetch him to school and then leave for home.

This would allow me to continue working. It’s funny. After today, my job seemed to have dropped to a lower priority.

You see, being able to work from home, I was able to cook breakfast, fuss over all the kids, play a board game with No. 3, cook lunch, watch him eat and welcome my No. 1 home and watch him eat the remainder of lunch. This is way more fun and way more worth it than a regular job. I am sure many mummies out there would tell me to wake up. “See if you would feel the same way after days or weeks of the same stuff!”

Perhaps. But for now, it is great to be able to watch my kids grow and flourish. Difficult and painful at times, maybe it is time I make a change myself.

There is a new TV series which has caught Dear Husband’s eye, called “Flash Forward“.  Essentially, the story is about how the world blacked out AT THE SAME TIME, everyone, for 2 minutes and 17 seconds.  In this short time, almost everyone is shown a scene from their own future,not now but in 6 months time, the date of 29 April, 2010.

It is an interesting “what if?” show.  One of the characters in the show saw herself with a man, not her husband in that future vision; her husband saw a vision of someone plotting ot kill him.  I could not help but thought to myself, what if it was me having the glimpse into my future?

If I do see a glimpse of my future, would I change the way I live my life now? 

Would each of the decisions I make as a working mother change? 

Would I scold my kids less and forgive myself more? 

Would I work less and play more? 

Would I be relaxed more and let go of control more? 

Would I want less and be happy more?

What if I were to die tomorrow? What would I do then?

These are great questions to ask myself as a modern working mother.  I then to be bogged down by the day to day that I forget to look at the big picture.  What really matters in the end?